The Green Ogress

Hey Dafter look at this!!!!

My colleague(Blow My own trumpet one-BMOTO) Yesterday come up to me and look with those "I know so much better" expression and asks ina conspiratorial tone!

BMOTO: What do you er think of new boss?

Me: Huh? We met him what 4-5 times? I have no comment on him. Loads to see

BMOTO:I have this knack and with some people my mind shows a red flag!

Me: So you saying this new boss has raised red flags in your mind? * looks expressionless*

BMOTO: Yeah a big one!

Me: I will reserve my judgement !

Well this is pure office politics! I dont like to get involved!

Anyone who likes my "ex" boss is a jerk because he was a jerk and BMOTO was his fav so...!!

From Mkfunky

1) Shakespeare or the Bible.
Shakespeare-I like his Twelfth Night!

2) Most romantic moment in fiction.
Love story by Erich Segal. I think the entire book is most romantic!

3) Favourite word?
Fawk

4) Most overrated writer
Paulo Coelho,Dan brown

5) Most underrated writer

umm... I guess Robin cook

6) Best meal in literature
ENID BLYTON-Famour five picnic meals

7) Favourite novel in translation
err

8) Favourite children's book
Enid Blytons

9) Books by your bedside
Enid Blytons,JK rolwing,Coma,loads I cant count all..

10) Sexiest book
Kamasutra

about my books !! My new boss asked me to lend him the Harry Potter book and I tookd 3 -4 days before I finally gave in!

I just didnt want to give him my book! What if he is not very good with books and bends a page?

The mere thought of him holding MY book somehow was disgusting!

Its not only with Harry Potter books it's with all MY books!! MINE

* think i need a a councellor now*

It was heart wrenching to give that book to him today!

Now the shocker!!!!! He told me he will take time reading since he already is in the middle of another book and doesnt get time to read!!!

Darn!!! *cruses* *fawk fawk Fawkittey Fawk*

I was working for Dell a few years ago and was only dealing with desktops for US based customers.

Here I list of the weirdest questions ever asked

1. Do you have Air Conditioning in India?
2. Do you travel to work in Bullockcarts?
3. Do you know what Coke,pepsi,mountain dew are?
4. Do you get bread,cakes in India?
5. Do you live in huts made of mud and thatched roof?
6. Do you have electricty ?
7. Are you sure you know computers well to help me?
8. Indian women are very beautiful ,So you sound beautiful . I can Imagine you with long lustrous black hair and tan beautiful skin!!
9.India? in Texas?(My reply was no India in Asia!!) So i get the reply-The continent????

PS this was inspired by a blog by Blakkie and a comment by Phinebooty which made me laugh!!!!

Seven personal facts:

1.I love music -any kind
2.I love watching old classic
3.I wanted to be a crimnologist or a lawyer
4.I hate snakes or any creepy crawlies
5.I am very emotional and very very soft hearted
6.I had 15 dogs 2 parrots
7.I love to explore the darker side of human nature
So I tag the following

MK funky
PotDonkey
Sapphirenight
BlinkPInk
Elle_dee

Oh I just went into the ladies room and looked at my behind and all around!!

I think I am not gaining 5 pounds every 5 minutes!!

*Feeling much much better*

Infact I think I look pretty darn nice

I dont know whats wrong or why but I am slowly getting more irritable.

I have i think reached the limit of "good shoulder to cry on" and "the ever dependable friend" , "Always there for a chat"

My time is not important only listening to you is.

I think I'm being selfish but months of talking to people and telling them a little about my general life and listening to them.

I dont feel like talking /chatting to any friends at the moment. Only to the close friends -rest not really feel up to listening to how their day went.

I am saying this because I just received a Message from a friend

He: Hey
Me: hey , i was offline dunno why my yahoo shows online *Lie because yesterday I was online but not interested in chatting*

Him: You dont love me anymore* baby poutish*
Him: your PC loves me more
Me:

I couldnt be bothered to reply,I dont hate him he is a nice friend. But I am in this phase right now where I dont wanna chat /talk to anyone

Yesterday one of my old friend called and My phone was on silent and didnt reply. Just sent a sms later that I was with mum watching a movie* half truth i was at home watching a movie*

I am avoiding people I generally would talk to

Wonder why?

You think I am being mean? These were the people who heard me out when I needed them, and I heard them out when they needed me!

.. I feel flustered! I think I'm eating more than I usually do.

I think I have gained 5 pounds since last 5 minutes and counting
I think I look like a blimp
I think even the fat from my fingers have moved into my tummy and breasts
My face looks tiny
My teeth look well like teeth!

I think I going crazy!I have bounty and maltesers on my desk and a box of snacks and I just gulped scalding hot tea!!!!

*burnt my tongue,it now has slightly prominent red dots*

Wait i think the toes have got a slight plump look too..

Whats happening..*aargh*

Monday blues? Hormonal stuff?

*Drama Queen*

I think I will write a book -Confessions of a Drama Queen(removed "teenage" to make it sound more original

Oh darn! back to work..  but I follow the above Calendar

* sleep walks to the coffee wending machine*

... no not those trunks!!

To move house I went out and got a few large trunks!!

I want to pack it all in Trunks and stack it!!

Boxes get ruined and damp in the rains so its trunks

I just called a few employees telling them their services are not longer required!

I feel sick on the whole!

Im sick of being me,sick of my own limitations and sick that I cant break out of my own thoughts and feelings and emotions!

My New boss just told me to Go home!!!!!!???? * disbelief*

* uses a toothpick to clear the ear to ensure I hear ok*

I mean in over a year that I have worked here No one has ever told me to go home just because I came to work early

*shocked*

I came to work by 7 AM today and so boss is asking me to leave!! Infact He has left for the day!!

* faints*

I have been reading "The Alchemist" Maybe that why i am now considering "Omens"

For the last 2 days while I am travelling to work in a cab(its cheap here) the car had a flat tyre! 2 different cars,2 different days but same problem.

Is this an Omen * looks around*

Maybe the Forces of Nature dont want me to reach work!

They want me to take a leave!!??

I am honoured and excited to play the part of Sis Tisis (maria) in the Sound of Bloggers

* excited*

*wow need to get hair cut shorter*

*need to get my dress ready*

*practice  the song-"the mills are alive with the sound of Bloogging"*

For those who havent heard about it click http://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2007/07/26/the_moment_you_ve_been_waiting_for~2704541

What do you think Dafter? I look okay?

Like I suspected last night, after all the huge mess and uproar they created. My US of A trip is cancelled yet again!!

I have been hearing this for over 7 months now!!

It's starting to be amusing in a very sarcastic way.

My company today told me I need to Fly to US tomorrow.. I was so dazed and all morning I was in an absolute mess

Now suddenly it all seems so cool. They were after my life to go and now they wont even tell me where I have to go and why and what for!!!

I feel they are doing what they did in January of this year!! Got me a visa and told me once every few weeks Im "flying next week"

I dont trust them,this maybe just another flop show.

When I told this at home all my brother had to say was that if after I fly back from US and have to go to a different City to set up and work I should Take Mum and dog along!!!!

*Fucking irresponsible moron*

I mean I would have asked Ma to come and live maybe a little in future if I have to move however the way my bro made this comment pissed me off..

Just goes to prove he doesnt want to take any responsibility of Mother and wants me to deal with it all while he enjoys and fucks around with a few more whores.

*fuming*

Each night i come home and he has hijacked the TV and the internet and wont let us watch anything and sit on his sorry arse and not move.

He doesnt even help in the kitchen or anything and simply waits for us to serve food to his lordship and he simply eats and (thank the lord atleast he keeps the dirty dishes back into the sink)not really watch TV or work on the net but keeps it under his control.

also he has come up with the idea that we move to a area 35 kilometers from my work place because its cheaper.. Well great for him he drives and its me and mum stuck at home since that area has no public transportation and its expensive to travel 35 kilometers to get to the nearest mall or main towncentre!

*such a fucking arse*

I am so upset I want drinks to drown and forget the world. This is one of the reasons I was a regular alcholic.I managed to quit and all this is making me crave again.

My whole life i have had to be the responsible one ,the mature one, the strong one,the solid support one, the no mess no fuss one,the dump all crap on her and she wont even squeak one,the serious one with no chance of a life or even a boyfriend.

(yeah thats right no one ever expected me to have a boyfriend they thought I'd just remain a spinster and take care of mum)

Well it seems like thats how it gotta be for me!!

It gets to me and I started drinking because for those few hours I felt light and weightless & blank.

I am also worried what mum thought to bro's comment. She is a proud lady and wouldnt want to feel like she is leaning on us.

..I had a tiny tear trickle when i came towards the end of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows.

One of my favourite characters die and iI'm so horribly emotional I cry when something tragic happens, or Unrequited love etc.
I sobbed like a baby watching Sweet November,City Of Angels and even Roman Holiday!!

I mean it!! I well up and turn red and burst into tears!!

Cant help it!!

.. as a part of the Uniform of LazyLand( of which I am the Princess)

A absolutely gorgeous , lip smacking sexy burgundy and cream satin and lace spaghetti strap top and tiny shorts!!

I look scrumptious in it.

PS: will blog its photos(without me in it)

This is my pet each Morning trying to stop me from leaving for work

She is blocking the main door.

.. at my Mother this morning.

She was reading the newspaper and switched on the TV and started discussing and asking how to start a toy train collection.

I was feeling clammy and sick and about to throw up plus no sleep at night( not a wink )

(I was in pain and my pet decided that i looked very soft and cozy and so dropped her 50 kilo weight on me and trying to find the softest part near my legs to put her head on and sleep.
Oh amazing how she snores and then kicks me if I take too much space!)

i have a weird pet

anyway

I feel sorry I snapped because she just sent me a text message asking if i feel ok.

I had some evening pasta snack at work yesterday and since then I am sick.

My tummy has these awful cramps and I have been sick twice since morning.

I cant even eat anything and am at work.. I think I should go home!!

* cramps again*

.. from a Colleague at work. Him and I were taking interviews(he is a trainer) and so we had a little chit chat and casual banter..

He started off on his family stuff and his "wild dope" days!

While I have on my way back home I get a text message

It was lovely talking to you. I wanted to ask you out on a date,but you kinda made it clear you dont date anyone especially from work

* really amazed*

oh and he aint good looking or anthing just a funny weird guy(younger to me by maybe a couple of years)

Weird how someone suddenly sends this Text barely knowing you a month (work related interaction only)

My boss ( the crappy idiot i keep cursing) has been moved to a different department.

Yet this doesnt really stop him from interfering in this one and bark orders as if he owns this place.

We are sitting here taking interviews -one after the other and its non stop.

A few breathers here and there ofcourse!

I just arrived at work over an hour ago and have already taken 4 interviews.....

Was sitting and just documenting it all when this Boss*fucking dick* arrives as if he is God of fucking morons*he just might be*

and barks at me

Dickhead: What are you doing sitting here? You are supposed to be in training with the new people you hired!

Me: I need training? * fyi I have had this training 4 times in 5 years that I have worked and much more advanced level ones*

* the miniscule prick*

Dickhead: Yes ofcourse! * looking at me like i am some dimwit*

Me: *sarcasm* Oh I didnt know that!

Dickhead: Well you need to be and so go now

Me: well, I am taking interviews you know! * glaring at his moronic highness*

Dickhead: well for what?

Me: oh the new project for which you asked us to!

Dickhead: oh! well see if you can attend this training

Well there you go! His replacement is so far a more reasonable Person and he hasn't asked me to sit in some training
But oh no this Moron has to feel important by barking at others ( in the presence of loads of employees)

*the bloody ant sized prick*
*impotent bastard*

PS: excuse the foul language I just cant control my thoughts when the Moron behaves this way

This is fast spreading virus and can infeact easily .

So I have decided to list the symptoms to nip it in the bud( if you want to those who dont continue to live in Potter Land)

Symptoms are:

1) loss of sleep due to waiting for the book release

2) exxessive discussions of the life and future of Potter

3) lack of appetite since Cho kissed Harry and Harry Kissed Ginny and Harry Dumped Ginny

4)Dreams of Harry killing Voldemort

5)Standing in the wet and cold weather to grab the first copy of the book at midnight( 5 AM in India)

6)Once book bought cant keep it down and hang on to every page and word like its the lifeline!

7) Still reading the book even when its past midnight

8) collecting all Potter calendars,mugs, and member of muggle.net and scolastic.Also have a collection of the pervious DVD releases.

Okay I raise my hand to two sumptoms the 7th & 8th

The instant cure is- unknown!! reading the book and finishing it diminishes it a bit

Meaning:’ An elephant never forgets' is a saying, so if a person has a memory like an elephant, he or she has a very good memory indeed.

Women have "elephant memory"

We remember every tiny thing people said or did and even if we say "oh I don’t think I remember" it's a lie.

I can say this with conviction because I do this a lot.

I Lie about remembering tiny details because if a guy ever knew how much my brain registers he'd get scared!!!!

Of course I have selective memory. I keep only those things in my memory which have some importance. Rest is indeed actually forgotten.

So next time you hear me say "oh err maybe I don’t know" it's a LIE -I do know I just don’t want to say because

a) It might freak you out that I remember every tiny thing you ever said
b) it’s not a pleasant memory and I'd rather not talk about it.

..and the deathly Hallows is Awesome, fantastic!! For those who are reading and who haven’t try it!

I haven’t finished the book yet but its simply superb!

I am addicted to the book and refused to let go of it all evening

Infact I was irritated when 2 of my friends decided to give me a call-
1) The Angry friend who believes all men are scum
2) Moaning Myrtle (only it’s a Man I know and is a good friend but recently all he odes is moan about his life)

The first caller was fun she talked to me about her life in general (fucked!!)And gave me strict warnings that I should never get emotionally attached to a guy because if I do she will personally come over a kick my sorry ass. The reason? She doesn’t want to see me cry over a man ever again!!!
Then she told how she's living with a guy at present(kept giggling) and that she cant really tell me everything because she is at home(meaning he is around)

Her giggles were a clear indication that the sex is obviously amazing but let’s see if anything happens!

She kept the phone asking me to come over to her town and leave my current "dry" of men city! As per her my city is devoid of men either good to speak or look at or sleep with.

Second caller is a slight bore. He called me yesterday as well to bemoan about how he is just a "graduate" and not well educated and how he can’t seem to find anyone to get married to. Then says the women he likes are just too much after the money he earns and since he doesn’t earn much dump him.

To tell the truth i think he is like all Indian men after this perfect, virgin, innocent, childlike, traditional, loving, motherly type woman!! The prob is this doesn’t exist and if they do they aren’t so nice within. They just make a show of being all those things. But he doesn’t get it he still ends up liking some "innocent" looking types.

When they dump him he moans!! I was tired of listening to his moaning. I have told him many times if he wants to pursue education go for it! He is blessed to have a family, his own house, an earning elder brother and even educated!

Every time he moans of his "lack" of education I feel a irritation because well to be honest I haven’t even had a bit of the things he is taking for granted!

Anyway called today and i was pretty short with him. Then He made fun of me reading! * Filthy idiot*

Ask me why I wasted money over a silly book .Said I could have bought clothes or anything more useful than books!
*angry and really irritated, started to sound sarcastic and disinterested*

I told him*in cold tones* I love to read and love books and I think this is an investment and not a waste of money.

I hate it when anyone makes fun of my choices and habits! Especially as if what I have done is a crime by buying a book!

Then kept phone and reading again

Well I got my copy of Harry Potter!!! Yay!!!

Have read a few pages already and so far it's AMAZING!!!

Also visited my gynaec for a regular checkup and she told me I look weak and told me off for overworking[] and not sleeping ending up looking pale!

So i have a few suppliments and asked to eat healthy!! Besides that she told me i am fine and asked me to get my medical reports for her to see which i had done probably 2 months ago.

So I am healthy but a bit pale!!!!

Since i couldnt stop myself bought a few nice bra's and am happy I finally got some nice suff!!

besides that? I am hungry and going to get something to eat!!!!

Where did this word come into my mind when I am chatting?????????????????

Maybe brain needs to be checked

let's try "lalal" to remove the word from mind

EDITED

The word Love again popped up! I mean this is a disease.. HAAAAAAAAAAAALP!!!!!!!!!

Monsieur once told me he likes to cook simple meals to nice loud music running in the background!

I love that too ,maybe we will cook up a storm

* no guarantees we would end up having dessert before we cook dinner*

a candidate in an interview :- "Why do you wish to join our company?"

Its not just a question to which i expect an answer It's me wondering out aloud!!!

I feel horrible ,Just told 10 people their services are no longer required and had a few crying at sudden termination just after 2 weeks!!

* curses my boss , bloody fucking asshole*

* i hope he is told one day suddenly that he is terminated and then will watch how he feels*

In Preparation of Monsieur returning I have a few things I gotta do!!

1) Get a Wax( would currently will give cave woman a fright)
2) Pre Gynaec checkup
3) Would have bought some sexy lingerie but I dont get those in my size
4) Do more yoga( go fish...)

Ps: Monsieur is back but in a very very dark mood!! bad day!!

* thinks what to do? better keep most of my crazy comments controlled who knows one might just spark off a darker moood?*

* bit of chit chat is better*

* looks under a rock*

* looks under the cubicle desk*

* looks under the PC and CPU*

*looks under a mouse(computer mouse not the rodent)*

* where is he? Where? where? where? Arrrrrrgh*

*bored and frustrated and till searching*

* bangs the PC*

*stamps feet*

* wonders where monsieur is today?*

*Not online or on email or even anywhere near his work??*

This is a True account of a email from ex boss. Any resembelance to a person living is Intentional

This took place in 2004 when I was working in my ex-company.

I had a Lady Boss and she was complete twit! Her grasp of slang vocab was very poor infact her grasp of general vocab was horrible.

So one day she sent us supervisors a email which was supposed to be a "shakes us into action" type.

It was detailing how we are incompetent and not up to mark What made me laugh and fall out of my chair was one line!! just one

Lady Silly Manager: " It has been found that Supervisors are shagging away their duties at work"

I thought It was a spelling error, but

She called us into a room and asked

Lady Silly Manager:"Why do I find you all shagging away at work?"

I was seen as a blur with a fit of coughing as the rest of the male colleagues looked on wide eyed and purple faced controlling laughing out loud!!

......... Just ate yummy Black forest cake slice..

*Licks cream off lips*

*gluttony is better than sex*

I mean it and ask him to replace Monica Lewinsky over Bill.*prays with fervour*

He has surpassed himself of being the biggest jerk,arse, moronic person ever in the History of all Bosses(Exception one ex boss but thats a different story not like him)

He has dumped work on me to create documentation and presentation on a new project and amazingly as ususal doesnt have a clue what he needs,didnt give us any documentation to work on and wants in today infact now and so I'm staying back again.*bloody fecking sophomoric Moron*

He wants us to create and train 30 people in within a week and ensure they are working and productive by 30th July

I infact was even working on scripts for voice calls and the idiot says" Give them more options and the IVR" and then when i asked what IVR? I mean what different options we have in IVR? he replied "Does it matter?"

* imagines placing his head between a revolving door and spinning it full force*

naaah too good for him

* nail him by the willy to the false ceiling*? Naaaa Ceiling will collapse!!!

* Hang him by his willy from the roof top?*

Eeeu he will ruin the beauty of the buildings!!

* feel like punching his silly idiotic face in and seriously readjusting the position of his nose*

It's offical now!

I hate the word "FYI" all my moronic boss can do is spam my mailbox with useless emails with 3 letters typed in bold "FYI".

"For your information"? Excellent as if I want to read junk which is not even concerning the work i do I will read penthouse.

Thats it I'm bored to death and leaving

I have to find some alternative things to amuse myself

1)Monsieur
2)..........art yes !
3) errr music
4) hmm Movies!
5)reading..... Getting my Harry Potter this weekend yay!!!!

*Stalks back*

Oh another boring day at work. I am sorry If I bored anyone with my abstract thoughts in pervious blogs, but I am so lazy and not in the mood to work that all weird thoughts are pouring out.

I guess made worse because of the wait for monsieur to come back sooner. I cant wait anymore *stamps feet* the past month went by in a blink and now the 2 weeks are dragging like a year!!!

I have done aboslutely no work of any use and I am only involved in listening music and my daily chats ofcourse which continue as usual.Which is the best part and then blog some abstract ones.

Was thinking I could change my style of writing- tried being asbtract this morning but I kinda dont like the feel of it. Then maybe I could write some erotica with details (that's gonna need some err practice in real life)

Mostly I am okay and thinking where I should invest and make some financial plans for myself.
One more day draws to a close and I am going to go home and fall into the same old rut!!

I sure need a change!!

Ah well I had the most realistic sexual dream last night and it ofcourse included Monsieur!!( no im not obsessed). It was a lovely dream and maybe I see one tonight too!! Some excitement even if in dreams!!

I was going through my one file which contains my memories.

I am feeling very nostalgic going through the cards,letters newspaper clippings.

Found a bronze medal i won in a state art competition when i was 12..I had forgotten about it.

Also greeting cards from a few Friends on "friendship day" as well as birthdays. What made me sad was I found One card in it which my Dad gave me! The only card he ever did dated 1998.It said to "my dearest daughter" made me cry! I dont know how he remembered my birthday that year but its the only thing i have from him.

Also found a letter from my first ever crush-Eric Strahorn. I was 12 he was 25 back then and reading that letter made me smile so much. He wrote such a simple and beautiful letter -telling me to study and do well in exams and how he is sorry one of my pup's died ,also, asking me how I was after my attack of mumps.

Going through all this stuff and then my art book which i used to paint when i was probably 14-15 years old. Kiddish paintings but they were not bad.

Some more cards made by juniors and given to me on New Year (i was a prefect in school). Really silly ones with hand drawn hearts and flowers with words like "you are sweet and nice" etc.I simply had forgotten all these things I had. It's been approx 8 years since I even went throught this.

I had more things I'm sure but I think they are lost or damaged due to water.

Old memories!

My Mother is an excellent driver- No didnt get those genes.

The only problem is sitting next to her when she drives is a nightmare.

I mean it anyone siting next to her will probably have a heart attack at the number of times she abuses "rash" drivers and the number of times the word "Fuck" is spoken with full gurgling force.

I was out to get the Harry Potter Tickets in advance because We are running houseful and i could only manage the 8th row from the screen.Anyway I am watching it with Mom!!!

So we were driving and she abused like all the drivers a million times and she actually gets angry..and I was sitting silent and actually lost in thoughts of Monsieur(Sent him more naked pictures of me today)

And to add to it I had to listen to her berate my ex. Excellent!!! Make me feel small for dating an Ass.

She went on how he made her feel small because he kept on and on about how his Dad owned a Merc and my mum had a Suzuki.

Then goes on to illustrate how it must have been a sharp slap on his face to see our "5 cars"( FYI all those belonged to Mother's Man)
I actually was staring out of the window and dreaming of the Monsieur and getting irritated by the minute over her rants over my ex and m brother's ex.

Then picked up Bro and things went down hill - his rants over how he told his boss off(he actually has an excellent boss who is so nice to give him an off when he broke off with his girlfriend) and how he drove his point in and that his ex called him this morning because her phone was barred(she took an add on card for him under her name).Also His Boss is understanding and a good friend as well.

Then bro asked "whats up with you? worried about your marriage?" I just could snort.

Last night one of my friends in London called my mum to discuss my "marriage" plans!!!!

I mean I appreciate her concern ,however, I want people to get off my back and let me be.I Need to have a guy to marry and its not fun to have people discuss my wedding dress and shopping and reception?!!!!.

Ooh even better I have been told I'm getting old!!!!!!!Wow Now my clock is really ticking.To take the matters further it's been decided that if I have a baby girl she's gonna be married off to friend's son!!!!

The amount of planning going on here and all I ask them is"hello who am I supposed to marry? a Mirror?"

And then mother -I was hurt with ex's cheating and all she can think of is how she felt small because he fibbed about his dad owning a merc.

I DONT CARE!I DONT FUCKING CARE IF HE FIBBED!

To calm myself I am sipping beer and suddenly beer tastes horrible!!

Ooh Watched "How to steal a Million" and It was awesome I think I'm in love with Peter O'Toole.

Currently Watching "Something's Gotta give" I love Keanu Reeves!! If i am 50 and I have a 30 year Old Keanu Reeves after me I wouldnt think twice

Anyway I think I will grow into a Ms Robinson(The Graduate) will seduce all younger men and own a few dogs and parrots!!

There was a Blackout In my City!

Infact we had no electricity since 4 PM till almost 6 AM today.

Was fun prancing around in my pants and a itsy bitsy torn top.

Candles lit all over and cool breeze and darkness all around!!

Alright!! its 5.06 PM and the party has started!!

lets meet up girls at La_spice blogland!!!

The one one party you dont wanna miss

get yer arse down there!!

Oh and i'd be a bit late since im going to change into my Can Can and pink ruffles!!

After yesterday's steaming temperatures at work , We are back to the SNT-Stiff Nipple temperature today

In other News -My immediate boss has quit and which means one Arse less here but, an even bigger prick is still here and thats the Big Boss.

Hope he gets sacked too I dont feel any amount of empathy towards him because he is terminating people left right and center and for absolutely rubbish reasons.

Besides that I have been given more useless work and my colleagues are boring and so I am close to snoring!!

Tagged by MkFunky

Yes time to play a silly game please. You have to copy the rules and then say who you would like to play you in a sit com about your life BUT then say who you think would actually be cast in the role. You can give reasons if it is not self explanatory. Then tag 5 other people please

I will have to think.. Hmm i think I would want Gillian Anderson to play in a sitcom of my( boring )life... But I think Alyson Hannigan would get cast because she is quirky and err kinda would play the role better

Now I tag y'all!! *scarpers*

It's Friday the 13th and all girls(and a few men) are Invited to Join in the best night ever!!

The excitement is Fever pitch and I can hardly breathe till the time turns to 5PM

We have a total of 13 Hens who are going to be there but I expect a lot of Gate Crashers and They are welcome beacuse we have all the Fun and excitement arranged.

Dafter with her Tutu and ballet pumps and Ofcourse has arranged the Fools Bar none

Also We have Perfromance from Adamantixx,Essexboy and Denzil. Cocktail waiters (Male Models) In Pink leotardsA DJ and Karaoke too..

your truly In Pink Ruffles and Can Can

C'mon girls let the fun begin.....

Who thinks I was a dumb idiot to fall for ex's soppy line of

"I wanna kiss you and Am in love with you?"

Voting requires you to comment and say "I raise mine"

I think I was an idiot and so am raising my hand!!!

*grumbles and thinks how moronic I could be to kiss him over such a line and then spend 3 years with him*

I will describe the Hilarious and weird circumstances in which my first kiss took place.

It was 2003 I think the Month was Feburary or March cant remember.

Well I was alone at my flat and thats when Piggy-Ex arrives to meet me. He used to flirt a lot and I would simply grin at times.

Mostly He told me how he keeps dreaming about me in a car and how he imagined I was under him.

Well My reaction was to dream analyse it and tell him he is starved of sex*no marks for that*

Anyway He was over and I was home alone since it was a weekend for me and my roomie was working night shifts.
He was lounging around(generally came to meet my roomie) watching TV and I was simply working on getting my instant soup ready for dinner.

I was tired and planning to go to bed early and Let him wait for Roomie because they usually used to sit up and talk " intellectual" stuff and I wasnt never involed in their boring talks.

So I would generally leave those two alone and go to bed and read or sleep.

Anyway, piggy-ex and me got talking and he started his bit of flirting with me telling me how he finds it impossible to believe that I have never had a boyfriend and am a virgin.

I just told him that nothing surprising I didnt want a boyfriend and so didnt get involved.

I was friendly with him and I liked him at that time and tought he was like a lost kid.(see blindness)

Suddenly piggy-ex said

"I want to kiss you", "i actually have fallen in love with you"

I kinda stared at him and skin colour changed from tan to pale to blazing red.

I told him "NO"

* thought going on mind im 22 and never kissed a guy and he seems harmless*

anyway standing at the door of my room I kinda kept looking at him for a few minutes before I actually went closer and planted the most boring kiss on planet earth on his lips.

I mean boring like there was no Lip movement,My lips were sealed shut and My heart was hammering so loud it would have actually jumped out.

I pulled away thinking kissing cant be much fun there was nothing to it but then I looked at him and He had his eyes shut and he was breathing pretty hard.

I kept staring I mean I couldnt have had that effect since it was such a cold kiss.

However when i kinda saw closely- I seemed to have an err effecton him.

Then he kinda came close to kiss and this time when he did I thought *chapped lips*

However the usual shiver down the spine was missing..

This is what my ex would tell me.This is weird stuff and his biggest complain was that I was not so active in bed and would always be "tired" which i was if you consider I was working 12 AM to 8AM and 7 days a week

He would always find fault with whatever i Did made me wonder if he wanted me only because I was a virgin or maybe because I had big breasts.

Ex-pig:-You know I have 2-3 women who are attracted to me and I get over 163 missed calls and SMS's from them.I guess all women like boyish charm

Me:- ha! *rolls eyes*

Well He one day told me:

Ex-pig :- you know thats the problem with women who look good,you guys are great on the eyes and definitely get a man hard but are pathetic and unimaginative in bed.Now those average lookers are blooy hot in bed and simply rock.

Me:- *shocked* I was speechless

Also

Ex-pig:- You know You have the most amazing breasts and i am sure all guys eye ball you but they dont know you as i do.. They dont know how boring you are * silly gay laugh*

Me:- yeah? well go and get someone else.

Again

Ex-Pig:-Im am sure if we break up you wont get another guy and *looks at with with pitying eyes* I promise you even if im married i would cheat on my wife with you. I would want you as my mistress since I love you and cant see you with any other man

Me:- *Silent glare* I would never be your mistress.

Oh and

Ex-Pig:- you know of all my girlfriends you are the worst one -you cant cook my kinda meals,you are lazy,you dont have sex often, behave like a 40 year old menopausal woman who is all dry and are cold and are simply not even a bit of the marrying material, but I am still ready to marry you.Because I know you love me.

Me:- as in most cases i ignore and sometimes cry later.

nearing the end

Ex-pig:- I gave up my family and came to you and all you can think of is me cheating on you.You dont care that I gave it all up for what? you and you arent even greatful

Me:-*rage* Well Thank you I appreciate you leaving your family 2 months after they insulted me and I didnt even know you were engaged to another woman and you dare come to me to make love to me and cry and tell me I am being unreasonable?
If I didnt know from your own sister you were engaged last week I wouldnt even know and you would have continued duping me. Get out!

Then wanted me back

Ex-pig:- I want to lead my life with you and I am ready to give us another chance and You need to know when I did have sex with fat lady (his now wife) I always used a condom and so there is no fear and we can be together. You need to make a few changes in you self and be more accomodating and forgive me this one mistake.

Me:- Wow ! I am so honoured that you used a condom .. Thank you for the care and concern but I cant forget the fact that your body was eager to throb inside hers and that your hands touched her body and I think if i let you near me or even touch me I cant erase the image of you doing the same with her and I will feel filthy and dirty if you touched me.

Now you wonder how I managed to stick with him for 3 years!!! I was Daft

Stole from MKfunky

1. Are u smiling right now?
yes I am its this bittersweet kinda smile.

2. Have you ever kissed anyone named steve?
Nope I have kissed ONE guy and he wasnt Steve...

3. What is irritating you now?
Work...

4. When did you last eat?
about 4 hours ago.I need more Food!!

5. Do you drink lager?
yes im not very choosy

6. Do you have any friends who are famous?
Yes I do have a really famous Cousin

7.Are you good at poker?
Nope

8. What do you want?
To live alone and have a baby someday and be happy

9. Are you tired?
Nope but I do have a headache

10. Do you like anyone?
yes I like a few

11. Pepsi or Coke?
None .I hate em both I love Juices

14. Do you Have piercings and tattoos?
Ears and a belly piercing and am wearing a silver and crystal lock on it.

15. Taco Bell or McDonald's?
Mcdonalds , No taco bell here

16. Last thing you said?
"Oh MY GOD"

17. What are you wearing ?
Pink striped shirt and formal black trousers.

18. Do you normally wear jewelry?
2 rings

19. How many Myspace views do you have?
I don't have a MySpace account.

20. Want to be a prince?
err I am a Princess so who wants to be a Prince.

21. Do you believe dreams come true?
Not anymore.

22. Last song you heard?
Enrique's- do you know

23. Do you like Batman?
No.

24. Who is in the room with you?
I am at my work cubicle

25. What are you wearing on your feet?
nice Shoes.

27. Who was the last person you told you loved them?
My mother

28. What was the last thing you ate?
Parathas- yum!

29. What were you doing before this?
Chatting with Monsieur! Still am

30. What is the closest item near you that is black?
My pc and My trousers

31. Who was the last instant message you received from?
From Monsieur

32. Who's house did you go to last night?
My own.

33. What do you wear more, jeans or sweatpants?
Jeans.

34. What is the last movie you watched?
The Family Stone

35. What do you currently hear right now?:
My own MP3 songs

38. Where are your parents?
Mum at home and Dad in his home and city.

39. Where did you get the pants you're wearing?
A shopping mall nearby

41. Where was your default MySpace picture taken?
Don't have MySpace.

43. Who are you currently texting?
No one

45. Is cheating ever ok?
No its not for me.. everyone else have their own ideas and are welcome to it.

46. Would you ever take someone back if they cheated on you?
I wont I threw Ex out

48. What is your entire schedule today?
Work,blog,work,blog,eat,Go home,Read, sleep.

49. Do you want someone you can't have?
Yes and i know its useless to but i cant help wanting can i?

I think I expect too much!!

Sometimes in my weak moments I want-all the normal things any woman would.

I am trying to reduce the expectations but I am not entirely successful

I feel hope is lost and now it's time to reduce my expectations too.

From past experiences I have come to know that my hopes have been dashed and expectations crashed [Oh my Im poetic]

Anyway I need stop expecting people to like me and love me exactly as I am(bad ,good & baggage)

It's not going to Happen

It's sad when you expect everyone to be good and nice and thats silly because not everyone is , thats why we are skeptical.

Need to stop

Expecting that if i love anyone they will also love me
Expecting my life will change and maybe for the better
Expecting things which normally most people have & take for granted

And I need to be more realistic and less of a dreamer

I have seen my dreams break and shatter and I dont want to hurt anymore.

Having even slight expectations and then knowing they will never happen hurts.

I think I am happy in my stress and sorrow that ways I know What to expect which in short is nothing. Atleat I wont get hurt and if something nice does happen for a change even if its a really tiny thing it would make me happy.

1. Where do you hang your towel to dry after showering?
hang it on the bathroom door

2. What kind of mouse pad do you have?
something which resembles a mouse pad.

3. Do you brush your hair with a comb or a brush?
comb.

4. From your opinion, who do you think is the hottest celebrity?
Hugh jackman

5. You got a project due tomorrow, do you use tape or glue?
Glue!

6. Chicken or pork adobo?
*finds out about adobo* . I love veggie but if have to I love chicken Tikka.

7. By the time you get to school, is the sky still dark?
It used to be dark in winters when I would go to school at 6 AM.

8. If you had a choice to see a unicorn or mermaid which would it be?
Unicorn.

9. what color is your underwear?
Pink today

10. What time does the sun usually set?
7 Pm i guess

11. What do you think of last before you go to sleep?

Read my Harry potter , think about the day and fewpeople

12. AC or fan?
Fan . AC gives me a headache

13. Do you wear braces?
No!

14. Can you hand stand?
Nope. Was able to 10 years ago.

15. If you were the opposite sex, how would you style your hair?
slightly longish to make a tiny neat pony-Keanu Reeves style.

16. What level math are you in?
D level(D for dreadful)

18. Which subject is worst, English or Math?
Math.

19. What's one thing you really want to do this very moment?
be anywhere but here.

20. After buying something, do you automatically throw it?
Never.

21. CD player or iPOD?
iPOD

22. Would you rather spin upside down goin 30 miles per hour or drop 400 ft. into water?
err can i choose NONE?

24. What you got planned for the weekend?
Stay at home and clean!!!.

23. Whats your favorite shape?
err errr I guess Its the Human shape

25. Have you ever gone ice skating?
Nope

26. If you were put in a room with nothing except for a pencil and a notepad what would u do?
Draw eyes

27. Is it always easy finding your remote everytime you want to watch TV?
It's with my bro all the time,when its not I need to search.

28. How was your day?
So far? Interesting!! I am chatting & talking stocks and shares!!

29. Do you grow your nails, bite or cut them?
Try to grow get irritated and so cut them nice shapely short.

30. Describe your handwriting:
Neat ,tiny and clear

31. Do you concider yourself a stalker?
I stalk I talk ..

32. Do you bruise easily?
Yeah too easily and marks take ages to reduce

33. There's nothing on TV except Barney and Japanese news what do you do?
READ .

34. Do you know more then 3 html codes?
Yes I took a diploma course in Animations and web graphics

35. You got a essay due, you either can type or write in pen, which do you choose?
write in pen

36. Do you wear jeans to relax at home?
jeans or hot pants(red ones again).

37. Describe yourself using one word?

Blabber mouth

39. Do you like ice in your drink?
Nopes Gives me the headaches

40. Do you have abs?
I think I have a flab ab!!

Fine : This is the word women use to end an argument when they are
Right and you need to shut up.

Five Minutes : If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour.
Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more
Minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

Nothing : This is the calm before the storm. This means something,
And you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing
Usually end in fine. 

Go Ahead : This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!

Loud Sigh : This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement
often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an
idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing
with you about nothing. (Refer back to #3 for the meaning of nothing.)

That's Okay : This is one of the most dangerous statements a women
can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard
before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

Thanks : A woman is thanking you, do not question, or Faint. Just say
you're welcome.

Whatever : Is a women's way of saying F@!K YOU!

Don't worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement, meaning
this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but
is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking 'What's
wrong?' For the woman's response refer to #3.

I am Guilty of using "Fine,Loud sigh,Go ahead,Thanks Okay,whatever"

This is a next generation of drinking!!

For all those who have or have not quit drinking but want to continue to Drink virtually can apply.

The pro's are immense:

1)Drink without actually having to consume
2)Mind feels like its had a few drinks
3)Friends join in and together we raise our glasses
4)Inexpensive and we can have sacks and sacks of Alcohol of any variety
5)No hangover
6)No adding more calories as in case of real drinking
7)Can make a scene and behave drunk and Not feel embarassed
8)other friends join in the fun and games of acting drunk

The list will go on and on!

So who wants to join me ?

Cheers I say * gulps a beer*

It's 11:43 PM IST here and Im at work!!!

%*^(*)(_)+_+*^&%$$$%%^^^&@@@(Curses)

ah what the fuck I will abuse!!

I am dumped with work last minute -Meaningless ,illogical work which I could ahve finished had it been given to me during work hours.

Anyone who knows Project Plans and process documentation knows how painful a task it is and I am making a report on something I have no idea but since I have been asked to make it I am.

I mean I have to ask co-workers to even make sense since they think I can make flow charts my simply creating "boxes on word" .. Well hello? What the fuck am I supposed to write in the boxes to show??

Dimwits,braindead,morons!!

Your Job Dissatisfaction Level is 77%

Your job is a total bummer, and probably the worst job you've ever had. Your co-workers stink. Your boss is a jerk. And your company is probably in trouble. Think about finding a new job quickly, even if it's just a not-so-great transition job. You've got to get out of there as quickly as you can!

http://www.blogthings.com/shouldyouquityourjobquiz

Your Toes Should Be Dark Red

Sexy and a little dangerous, you give off a totally vampy vibe. Your flirting style: Straight forward and seductive Your ideal guy: Powerful and a little intimidating Stay away from: Mama's boys

http://www.blogthings.com/whatcolorshouldyourtoenailsbequiz/

Incase all you ladies have forgotten we have a Ladies night on Friday 5 PM onwards

We have everything set and ready!!

All decorations( no no nude David's around) are in place and the stage is set for the performers

I hope to see you all there

I have 9 invitations in my account and I dont want to accept a single one..

Your Linguistic Profile:

55% General American English 25% Yankee 15% Dixie 0% Midwestern 0% Upper Midwestern

http://blogthings.com/whatkindofamericanenglishdoyouspeakquiz

Your Mind is NC-17 Rated

You're mind is so filthy... you should should be washing every part of you out with soap. If your thoughts can go dirty, they do. Almost everything is NC-17 to you!

http://blogthings.com/doyouhaveadirtymindquiz

Okay this is the disgusting part and I Hate Nature at present

Why do I have these side effects of Periods?

1)Bloating
2)Flatulence
3)Cramps
4)hot flashes
5)Sexual arousal
6)breast soreness

Dont read this blog its disgusting to see how nature inflicts this on us Ladies

I feel like Monica geller(of FRIENDS).

Remember there was a episode when her parents had stacked boxes with her personal Memorabilia when the basement flooded and Ross's stuff was all safe and dry?

Well Had a similar experience today .Mum was afraid some of our boxes are ruined and it turned out that I barely had any of my old stuff left

Most of m paintings and school items are sodden and wet and am trying to dry them whereas bro's stuff is all safe.

We managed to salvage most items out of the rain and one room is messed up with all sodden stuff laid out to dry.

Oh In the event chanced upon a book of granddad's over 50 years old containing portraits of(photographed) naked women(he was an artist).

An aggressive leader that lives as you please, you are determined to seek out the answers for your questions.

If only you could see what I have seen with your eyes!

I feel better today, lesser areas in the body which pain

Got up around 10 Lazed a bit and then worked my arse off cleaning the house while Bro slept till well after 12 noon.

Mother cooked yummy breakfast and I brushed dog, cleaned the carpet ,dusted and mopped up till everything was sparkling clean.

I also rearranged my pot pourrie and now I feel very relaxed as my living ,dining and kitchen has a nice fragrance of lavendar and my room is a warm coconut-y vanilla fragrance.

I feel proud of myself ,ofcourse the breakfast made me feel like I have stuffed another 5 kilos-bloating

Ah Now to sip a tiny glass of wine to make this day purr-fect.

Oh and its raining and I see the hills in the distance covered with heavy grey cloud..

Bliss!!

*Guilty pleasure:- I was found gazing at those white shoes again*

The Wind's Calm Trees whisper Bird's have Vanished People warm and home The city looks dead Roads deserted Beauty of dusk So peaceful so tranquil Venus casts a spell on the celestial world Moon like a solitary voyager sailing through lapis lazuli sky Like a king in all his glory and subjects full of stories to tell old and new of kings ,queens & knights of generations old and new Beauty of dusk Stars twinkling with mischief Beauty of nature prevails When all else fails to capture the fleeting heart

Some dream of Greatness but never try to achieve it Some dream of fame but never succeed Some inspire to achieve greatness but never really mean it Some never dream'cause they're afraid to dream it Do you have the courage to dream? to make them come true? Do you have the will to win? No harm in building castles in the air,but work hard to create a foundation and make it come alive. So, dream of castles and dream all you want No dream is impossible unless you think it is. * I wrote this when i was 16*

I am Bugged ,I am moody and I got the worst cramps.

I need painkillers and wine to feel better,but I feel bloated too so I am sipping hot tea

I ate a little food but each morsel feels like it's adding 5 kilos to my body and millions of calories worth fat.I feel like a mini blimp.

My back hurts ,my legs have cramps and my abdomen feels like someone's twisted it into knots *arrrrrrrgh*

On top of this torture inflicted by nature I was dragged for grocery shopping with Mother and had to almost lean on the cart due to excessive pain(forgot my painkiller) for 3 hours!!!

Have i told anyone that standing in a crowd makes me nervous and I get scared and get panic reactions? well I got those and I had my periods kiling me .I actually broke out in cold sweat.

Finally I was close to collapsing we returned home.

Oh and I was pretty snapish and waspish because mum again picked up some "why cant they do this" topic which had to do with this neighbourhood 5 Kms away and I at present dont  Fu*king care if they dont maintain their gardens or maintain sidewalks.

We bought some really lovely bright yellow coffee mugs in paisley prints and I got myself some new lace underwear in white and Ivory!

I rented a DVD for The Family Stone and  the classic How to Steal a Million (Audrey Hepburn) so am going to relax and let the perido pains subside.

*PS:- I still want Monsieur here now to cuddle" 

I know I know sounds like a boring topic.

But I will write it anyways

I want to be remembered by those who i meet as someone Kind and someone genuine. Someone who made them smile and maybe helped them when they had a problem.

Someone who hugged them and made then feel better and someone who gave them hope that life's good and not to loose hope in the good things..

I was at one point afraid I'd be gone from this world and no one will remember me.

I love being in the background because I can be there when someone needs me.

I know sounds boring nightingale syndrome but I am like this.

Dont get me wrong! I love my current set of few friends but I they are all married or to be married or in a steady realtionship.

My friends list includes the following

1.Couple A with a baby
2.Couple B with a cat
3.Would be Married college friend
4.In a Steady relationship Childhood friend
5.30 year old who is afraid the clock is ticking and talks of this younger guy she wants to marry
6.Single girl who is dating many men because her long term boyfriend ditched-angry at all men kinds.

Now I am because of this left each weekend devoid of any friends to visit or go out pubbing with or even to go shopping with.

If I call friend number 5 I would have to listen to endless details of how his parents/my parents, Age difference, children,marriage and it goes to a point where mind phases out and I start thinking plucking eyebrows would be interesting.

When i call friend 6 she keeps telling me I'm too soft and that i should fuck around as much as possible since all men are scum and goes on to tell me I should visit her and we can together hook a guy or a girl and have fun..She is good company to party but lives far away

Friend 4 is generally busy with her live in and I cant impose on her too much..Oh and if i do go to her place and we get drunk (one occassion) I ended up blabbing about Monsieur. Shame on me I didnt give out details of who and stuff but got irritated when she started talking about her Mr perfect(I am a bit*h)

Friend 3 lives in a different city and was initially this wild child with loads of men and now is this complete different woman and about to get married. I feel like i dont know her anymore.

friends 1 & 2 are married and lead a hectic life managing house and work and in respective cases a baby and cat.I cant drag them to go out with.

So this leads me to think I need new SINGLE friends who would love to go out and indluge in bitching and gossip and over all fun to be with and who will not go on and on about their other half.

Who are not "smug married" types and who dont look at me and say" we need to find you a guy" or start planning my wedding even though I'm actually not dating at all.

I think I'm being unfair to my friends who do care about me but I need a change..

You Are Strawberries with Cream

Fresh and uncomplicated, you are always enjoyed but often overlooked. You're confident in who you are. You don't need a facade to feel better about yourself.

http://www.blogthings.com/whatdessertareyoumostlikequiz/

I love strawberries 7 cream  yummy

Your Passion is Purple!

You've got a ton of passion, but you don't always wear it on your sleeve. If something truly excites you, you let your inner intensity shine through. But otherwise, your passion tends to morph into energy ... which you never lack. You're a balanced woman, knowing when to turn on the fire in your heart.

http://www.blogthings.com/whattypeofpassionatewomanareyouquiz/

* looks smug and  happy*

 http://www.blogthings.com/howmuchlustdoyouhavequiz/
Darn it!!! I thought I'd be a 50% atleast

This is my biggest fear and it's at present has a very strong hold on me.

I am afraid that I'm not as intellegent and as capable as other people working because I am not as qualified.

I mean they are people with MBA's and degrees in their profile and I am an undergrad with no education to support my credibility.

They have training on vast fields like Finance, technical.HR and are still found pursuing some course or the other.

Here I am- I studied psychology till 12th grade and I learnt most of the things through direct practice. I know Many will think that's worth more than theory.But Theory creates a base right?

Also There are so many things i dont know and I am not ashamed ot say it but keep shut because people look at you like you are brainless if you ask a question or admit you dont know.

This is one reason when I think of where I'm working I see no future since I dont have the necessary degrees and degress in corporate and technical fields are given a HUGE importance.

I feel really tiny among all these heavy weights who flash their knowledge.

I mean i dont even know simple financial things which may or maynot be useful.

All i know is what i learnt in my first job and thats the kind of thing which doesnt really come into use where I am working now.

I dont feel pride in what I do..I used to feel that with initial job and then my second one.. Now i feel like I have dont nothing great and nothing worthwhile.

To compound my fears i am afraid I'm uninteresting and no one would actually enjoy my company because I end up saying something silly or I end up looking like an idiot in an intellectual conversation.

I just dont think I'm that great I mean I dont have the looks to be interesting nor brains.

I am at best what can be called Plain Jane and average brains.Guess that's a compliment for me.

I might be a nice person but how many actually want an soft hearted girl?

That alone can't get me a thing right?

There have been comments made on me in the past which i was Unfortunate enough to hear most were:-

"she's nice not brainy but bearable"

or

" she seems like a blonde with girlish giggles"
Or

"she's a snob"

I cant be bothered to correct them..

Your Eyes Should Be Brown

Your eyes reflect: Depth and wisdom What's hidden behind your eyes: A tender heart

http://www.blogthings.com/whatcolorshouldyoureyesbequiz

No Wonder I do have brown eyes

My mother met a man around the time her relationship with dad was almost over.

He was the man who gave her a job and helped us through the time when mum left dad.

He and mum had a long relationship lasting over 10 years.

Mum was 5 years his senior and divorced and He had an unhappy marriage and 2 kids.

He got mum and us a house and of course a partnership in his business and they for years shared a very loving but secret relationship.

I remember as a 12 year old I would question Mother why she can’t marry him and why he can’t divorce his wife if he is so unhappy with her.

Never got an answer besides “it's not as you think".

He was really nice to me and my brother. Would always be caring and though he wasn’t so with his own children with us he would play and behave like a kid himself.

He would buy us things like a watch and clothes which our own dad never did.

For my 13th Birthday he got me a small Casio and even a piano shaped chocolate cake. I never celebrated my birthday before this one. Dad would never celebrate mine. My brother's was celebrated sometimes and during those rare occasions mine would be combined with his.

Mother would sometimes bake a cake for me on my birthday to make me feel happy.

This Man took care of us all and He almost lived with us and was accepted as part of our family.

He sadly has a disease which is not infectious or transferable and called lymphoma sarcoidosis.
Through the years my mother and some nice doctors have treated and took care of him to recover. He has but this is non curable and can only constant medication can reduce the effects.

Over the years there have been many who have tried to malign mother because of her association with him.

His own family obviously hated us and had at times send people to threaten us to leave or else dire consequences.

We were the outcast in the neighbourhood and my mother the scarlet woman for stealing a woman's husband.

I came across a diary of mum which spoke of her relationship with this Man in-depth and how she wishes to die and leave all what's her's to him.

How she loved him and her heart ached when he was hurt or upset. I read it all and for a 15 year old it was a shocker.

I mean I knew there was something going on but this was hard facts. The sex, the love life and the small holidays and getaways.

Then things began to sour there was a fall out between him and my brother and since then never have they ever been anything but remote and polite to each other.

With me? I loved him as a father and would always sit on his knee and whisper the day's happening in his ear and he would patiently listen.

He was the one who told me about periods and was instrumental in educating me about the changes which will take place in my body (Mum lost her nerve since I was totally unaware and kept asking a zillion questions)

He would buy me my first trainer bra and later at times when I was sick because of the pain due to periods he would get me painkillers and ever more tampons if needed, infact till I was 18 I never bought my own tampons and bra's.
He would always buy for me. We share a special father-daughter relationship which is hard to describe.

Many people may find it a bit different for a father figure type to be so involved in my life but he was.

Time went on and since last 5-6 years the relationship between him and my mother kept deteriorating. Mother was going through a nervous breakdown and many menopausal syndromes and she was always emotionally a little over reacting.

Certain misunderstandings crept in and my mother’s emotionally fragile state and her temper was out of control.

There were crying and shouting and fights, The Man was the calm type but had a quick temper. He would want things in a certain way and he never understood why mother always was cynical and non trusting of loads of people because he always was the trusting kinds and who would go to help anyone if they once called.

There were many who took advantage and because of this he suffered a lot of financial losses in business.

My mother's shouting and screaming never helped and slowly it came to a point where they stopped talking and would work in silence and he stopped coming to the house where mum lived.

We had already moved out and he had a fight with mother for letting me live and work in a different city since he wanted me to work at my home town and then see me married to someone nice he would select.

Anyway, One day I get a call from my mother who is crying and hysterical and she told me she was leaving it all and coming to live with me.

I was surprised and asked what happened and she sobbed so hard I could get no words from her. All I could say was come over and live with me.

It's been 10 months since that day and my mother is living but she sends him sms's and calls him sometime and mostly he doesn’t respond and sometimes he would answer calls and when that happened she would be found crying alone.

Good Morning Everyone!!!!

I am at work and feel sleepy and grumpy and was reading the blogs I wrote last night and though to myself - I 'm crazy and hormonal.

I am still moody but okay- I will survive another day.

I just dont feel like answering phones or speaking to anyone. Most irritating...

I did take 2 hours to make up my mind and "sort" err sought him out. He was busy and I am to moody to run after him all day for HIM to talk to ME.

If he wants to talk he can bloody well give me a call and ask me to meet him in his Cabin.

Oh we had hoax bomb threat in our UK office . Bloody pranksters and all terrorists go to HELL.

I think I’m nearing the time of month Maybe that’s why im irritable or is it because im so confused.

I am irritable when my Mother talks and gets over hyper about issues she is discussing. She wants to make an issue of every problem in our building, with neighborhood anyone.
She starts to talk an gets angry and totally intense and I feel like snapping at her.

I feel like running away. I don’t hate her I just don’t want her to get involved. No one cares about me or my life why should mother care about it all?

She still holds intense resentment with some persons who have maligned her and who took steps which kinda made her life miserable since it backfired.She cant let go of the past and She hold a grudge and deep seated anger for all the mishaps and the hurt and pain and that comes out of her almost everytime she picks up any topic.

I know she is hurt but I just want to shout and scream and ask everyone to shut up.I hear her problems ,bro's problems and I hear all day everyday.I dont vent mine (so that's another issue).

I always tell her to be silent and not bother but she doesn’t and sometimes it simply makes things worse when she gets angry and talks loudly.

One time I had to tell a guy to back off since m mother screamed at him for bad driving and he got angry and was threatening. I almost hit the guy for screaming and abusing her.

But I got angry at her for screaming too.

I want to run away and hide.

Also work wise I’m confused I have lost the drive to work and I have an offer to join a company or more money But I don’t want to change and go because I fear in a year I would itch to change that company as well. It’s too much of a bother

I don’t know what to do and I have lost the ambition to work. Anyway work for me is just means to earn money and it’s not what I wanted to do.

I feel resentment and anger and don’t know what to do. I want to just take off work and re-organise my life but i dont know where to start and I cant afford to take time off work because the money pays for me and family.

I want to cry at the injustice of it all and I know it's childish to feel like this..

I HATE it when men( super troll at work) Call me FAT!

I mean who gave you the right to pass comments on my weight?? (He has his belly hanging over his belt)

I was in such a foul mood I went and ate pasta

But seriously he is such a slime ball with no penis. Asks me

Slime Ball: why dont i see you on messenger anymore
Me: because my network doesnt work
Slime ball: you have gained weight(eyes rolling all over me yuck)
Me: have i? Thats an inappropriate thing to say to a lady
Slime ball:Just stating facts.Maybe you sit around too much no exercise
Me: oh yeah? Blame the weather for weight gain

I dont think i have gained and even if i did what the fuck does he care?

My Sophomoric boss(the moron) walked up shook my hand (held it for 55 minutes was more like it)

And tells me He wants to "speak" to me tomorrow and that i should sought him out.

Hmm hmm * bites nails*

I dont know what it's gonna be and anything he talks generally means bad news

*prays to god*

This is one of the Banned on MTV song. It's stated that MTV banned it and has not Played it ever since it's release 20 years ago.

Your Kissing Purity Score: 77% Pure

You've hardly ever been kissed But the kisses you've given are very missed

http://www.blogthings.com/kissingpuritytest

Darn it I need more kisses- Monsieur you are required back ASAP

Your True Love Is a Cancer

Why you'll love a Cancer: Cancer's loyal and sincere heart makes your own sensitive heart melt. Caring and devoted, a Cancer will take the lead in pursuing you - and not give up! Why a Cancer will love you: You're laid back enough to deal with Cancer's little mood swings and freak-outs. A fellow homebody, you know how make Cancer comfortable and at home with you.

http://www.blogthings.com/whatsignisyourtruelovequiz/

Wink Wink!! 

All Cancerians please line up , No TOM (Cruise) You are Married so aren't eligible

You Are: 40% Dog, 60% Cat

You and cats have a lot in common. You're both smart and in charge - with a good amount of attitude. However, you do have a very playful side that occasionally comes out!

http://www.blogthings.com/areyoumorecatordogquiz

There goes my feline charm!!

Relationships are perplexing. What makes us tick?

I was discussing the topic the reason why men cheat and why women cheat.

The common thought is that Men dont cheat becase their women dont satisfy them anymore so it's hardly got anything to do with attractiveness or any of the things about the woman.

Which means Men who are perfectly happy with their girlfriend or wife also can cheat.

Why though thats my question?

Women cheat when they are vengeful and when they feel they are not appreciated anymore.

Also Cheating can re-estalbish the feeliing attractivness in a Woman and virility in a man.

A man might cheat just for the thrill of it and for the change as well..

Maybe ALl this is simply gibberish because I'm no expert. I know one thing when I was dating ex I had the biggest urge to cheat on him when I did have a few oppertunities.The reason I wanted to was because he always made me feel indaequate and cold.

I just wanted to cheat on him out of anger and spite ,to prove he deosnt get the girls as he used to boast (I had this girl and did this for you and that but left them for you in a very accusatory note)
I wanted to prove to him that I can get any guy I want and he would be happy to have me. But, I didnt because my conscience kicked in .

I live in dreams and an idealistic world because I want to escape the real world for sometime and not face the harshness it brings at times.

I live in a world with peace,Harmony , love ,Faith and trust. I imagine myself living in a nice cozy flat which is mine and I have no financial problems or issues at home.

I Live alone but I feel loved and happy.I have adopted a baby as well a girl, I take care of us and sleep feeling safe holding a pillow.Yes, there will be a Man but i dont want to dwell too much on it because it brings out a longing.

I sound crazy, I think I'm just idealistic and wishful.

In reality I go home each night a lone figure walking up to my building and I see windows lit up and families gathering inside going about their work.

I see grandparents and children wrapped in the warm coccoon of their family ,watching TV playing and happy without any care besides the missed homework from school.

I see happy faces,sad faces , I hear a couple fighting and a grandparent walking their dog in the cool evening breeze.

I spy a young couple decorating a house , a Mother cuddling a baby and the pure un-adulterated sound of a baby's giggle.

I hear the pet dogs bark and children singing and some Teenagers laughin loud after a few drinks and a family living a floor below who sings and strums a guitar each night.

I walk into my flat with my dog jumping to greet me as if I was away for a year and not 10 hours. I sit on my bed room window and look out at the mountains in the distance and the stars above.

about you

Your inquisitive nature, imagination, and hands-on practicality make you an EXPERIENCER.

Although you have an active imagination, you also concern yourself with the functional elements of things.

You are willing to experiment to find things that work the most efficiently.

You are Generous

Your awareness of those around you, along with your nuanced perceptions of the world at large, makes you the GENEROUS person that you are.

The rules:

What sort of fictional character would you like to play in a film?
Tell us, give an example and explain why and tag five other bloggers to do the same.

Nick's picky supplementary rule:

"I don’t want to know what character you think is most like you; what would you like to pretend to be in a film and why?"

I would be Sharon stone of Basic Instinct part one. I would be a Kickass writer and a brilliant one.

Be absolutely uninhibited in my life and wear sexy tiny dresses and make men and women melt and feel like putty with just a stare

Drive my car and live life on my own terms and care zilch about what anyone thinks

I tag KevinWilson,Adamantixx,Bluebutterfly,Abilene,Dafter,Rhianwen,Sapphiere_nights,Ladee-Bird

Err No pun intended

I never understand men & women relationships!

I mean I don’t get why we do things to distance ourselves from the one we love... Why we try weird reverse psychology which will only make things worse

Also there are like millions of non-verbal signals thrown at each other and why we just "expect" the other to just understand!! It almost feels like I'm in a radio environment and need to get radar to catch the signals

I mean me never get it unless it’s a very obvious non-verbal signal. I want the person to tell me what he wants.

Similarly I don’t keep shut unless I’m angry and then it’s obvious I am and needs no rocket science. I tell what I want, but here's the catch I tell only if I know the listener will understand.

Also I don’t understand the blow hot blow cold behavior... you know what i mean one day warm and friendly and other remote and distant.

I mean I know when I do this and can give an excellent example. I blow hot and cold when I fear my emotions for someone is strong and I am not sure how he feels and am afraid they might gauge my feelings and feel weird and uncomfortable. Also I fear I might get hurt and so I suddenly turn cold. But it doesn’t last long.

I just can’t control how I feel and I can’t be cold all the time.

It's a lot of hard work to maintain barriers we create to shield ourselves.

Why can't we simply communicate and not play games all the time?

I love to play teasing games however they are for fun and aren't meant to F*ck someone's brains.

They say Men are simple creatures to understand but I think not... Even they have complex feelings and thoughts which can’t be categorized same as women.

I read this article yesterday in the local newspaper and Mind boggles!!

SPRUCE up your appearance ladies and take grooming very, very seriously.And even with appearance, he goes straight for the jugular — those aspects that signify a woman’s sexuality are most attractive to him. For a man, the seduction game is all about sex, sex and more sex. Only then comes — even more sex!

Evolution has geared men to look for facial sexual signals. Research shows men are most attracted to a childlike face, for this arouses their paternal instincts to touch and protect. With eyes, men world over go for the large, luminescent variety. When a woman is attracted to a man, her pupils dilate. Contact lenses give the impression of glistening eyes and permanent dilation of pupils. And sure enough, studies reveal that men find women with contact lenses very sexy! Lips, if we are to believe Freud and zoologists, are an outer manifestation of a woman’s sexuality and fill with blood and swell up when she is excited. Men find full, sensual lips attractive. Do you wonder at the silicon injects women undergo to get the bee-bitten swollen look?

A man likes a woman to say positive things to him, ask questions about and show interest in whatever he does. Of course the one thing that puts him off is a woman who clings — is too needy and wanting all the time. A woman must give him his space. A trick the colleague shares is that the woman must keep withdrawing a bit and coming back again — so as to keep him on his toes. A man appreciates a slight aloofness over a clingy attitude.

However, things are different when a man is looking for a long-term partner. Unlike women, men, with their age-old hunting instincts, know exactly what they are looking for when their search for a partner begins. And, a man makes a difference between short-term and long-term partners, with criteria for both differing.
If it is a fling or a one-night stand he is looking for, he looks out for women who are provocatively dressed, sexy and a little drunk and loud. If she doesn’t drink, confesses a male colleague, forget about it! You aren’t in luck that night. For a short-term affair, she must also be friendly and warm into the bargain. However, if a man is looking for a long-term relationship, the criteria changes. Now he’s looking for a beautiful girl, warm and friendly. She should be sexy but not overtly so — after all you wouldn’t want a Carmen Electra as long-term girlfriend, would you, exclaims the colleague in horrified tones! She should be ‘different’ from others — warm, attractive and a good conversationalist. Research shows personality, good looks, brain and humour is a man’s wish list in order of priority for a partner.

Darn so much over what a Man wants! No wonder so many are single * sips rose wine*

I sometimes think I maybe attracting wrong type of attention. Maybe i need to re-evaluate my body language and non verbal signals.

I always have had men think they can paw me and it's irritating.

I had one fat troll at work who suggested i go out for drinks with him -Alone and was suggestive.
Then had my own boss kinda always place his hands on my back as if i invited it?

Then two years ago My childhood friend(we grew up together ,played in a park and basically were more like family than anything else even thougyh he was a few years older)

One night 2 years ago he was passing through my city and wanted to meet up.. Well I know him since i wore diapers and pigtails around him so I obviously was delighted and told him to meet me at my place.

he said he would stay over and leave early morning since he had a flight. Thats pretty normal back in my home town there were many times he would stay over.

At night i feel a hand slide down my pants and i jolt up and push it off. He actually begged for sex since he stated im his best friend in the whole world and he can ask me to as a friend. He said he was 27 and a virgin and wanted his first time with a friend.

I was shocked I told him "NO" i am NOT interested and He should go back to his room. He didnt instead tried to grab me and feel me up and again I didnt scream or blow my temper i was ANGRY and I told him in very COLD Fury tone to get the hell out NoW.

He did and i never saw him again .He tried to contact toexplain however i have refused any further contact.

I guess he Lost a good friend!!

But I do think is it me? or is it that i have the bad luck of meeting all weirdos?

Am i a weirdo magnet?

I fell
I fell and hurt my knee
It was slippery and wet and had to take my dog to pee
the dog kept steppin on my knee
I stood on one leg and fumbled for a key
let myself in and bandage my kneee

Well it actually happened and now i got bandgaes all over my left knee!!

I am at work and it's raining and i have to go for an interview!! I dont know if I will be able to walk

Our Met Department have sent out warnings that we are in for pretty heavy rains for the next 48 hours(it's been raining the entire week!!!)

Many coastal cities here have been flooded and its a sad situation!! roads have more than 4 feet of water and then the sea is angry and churning huge waves!

The day is dreary and cold and grey!!

Its pouring buckets
Each drop feels like nuggets
Run for cover else get hit with watery pellets
Stay indoor and enjoy malt & spicey croquette

This proves I'm pathetic at poetry...

Keep safe everyone